Thursday, February 20, 2014

Laughter Described (#1): Game Day Hydroplane


When I first think about situations involving fits of laughter, somehow I have come to realize that am always the source being laughed at. While it may seem sad, I am happy to know that my friends will always be offered an endless supply of laughter at my expense. Due to the excessive amount of tripping, slipping, wiping out, falling, and collapsing in my day-to-day life, one must only wait a matter of minutes around me if they are seeking a good laugh. I would love to say that my clumsiness is a family thing that I just so happen to have attained the gene for; however, this is not the case. Everyone in my family seems to be extremely graceful actually. My dad is quite the wake boarder, water skier, and surfer, so his sense of balance makes me believe that I may actually be adopted. Well, I’m not, so I might as well embrace it and provide comic relief for all of those around me. During finals week, I wiped out every time I went outside. This week even after a slight chill that provided slick grounds I proceed to slide down the steps of Milton Daniel. Falling up the stairs? Yes, that has happened too. Slipping on water in the BLUU with a tray of food in my hands…yep me as well! Well all of this talk about my inevitable gracefulness leads me to the epitome of my falling career that seemed to leave everyone smiling for hours… well months… to come. So, being the proud horned frog I am, I got all ready for game day this football season. Anyone frog football fan can tell you that this football season has been a wet one. Seemingly every home football game provided some sort of storm, torrential rain, or even light mist. Well with water comes slippery grounds. Happily as ever, I tied my bow in my hair, laced up my cheer shoes, and put on my freshly dry cleaned cheerleading uniform. To preface, each quarter of the football game, the cheerleaders rotate to different corners of the football field. We will start in one area and gradually (or not so gradually) make our way to the other side. This part of the game seems to always be a bit hectic. Either we are running into the tunnel for half time, running out of the tunnel for pre game routines, or simply moving from one end zone to another. All the while, we are making sure we have all of our water bottles in hand and haven’t left someone behind. We are far more focused on making sure we go to the correct part of the field that the media team so specifically explains each game. So, as with any ordinary day, the first quarter ends, and the rain begins. “Lovely,” I think to myself. Here comes the curly hair, running make up, and humid air. Little did I know, the last thing I needed to be worrying about was my hair. This quarter change, we had to move from the recruit section to the alumni section. This requires that we pass behind the player’s bench and run with haste to get there before the media breaks. Behind the players bench is a large crevice that seems to accumulate everything that a football game has to offer: rain, dirt, food, gum, you name it! That is precisely the area we were told to run through. Now without the rain this would have been no problem. But peppy as ever, I pick up my water bottle, begin to run toward the alumni section and then it happens… Just as I really get going, my feet suddenly come out from under me, and before I know it I am sliding on my stomach passed the entire bench. The players aren’t paying attention so they aren’t the concern. The fans, however, have the perfect view of me as I surf past them on my stomach through the water, dirt, and food in my uniform. I wish that I could better explain this visually, but just picture me starting from one end of the player’s bench and sliding on my stomach unable to stop myself all the way to the other side of the bench. That’s a long way! Just when I am thinking that no one saw, I look behind me to see my teammates, the ones that love me most, literally rolling on the ground out of laughter. This situation epitomizes the superiority theory. They felt so proud of themselves that they made it through the slush without wiping out only to see me hydroplaning. Not only was this superiority theory, but it was also relief theory. They initially laughed to cover up the awkward situation, but more importantly they thought I was seriously hurt for quite some time until I myself laughed to keep from crying. Once they knew I was ok and more importantly that I hadn’t been wearing one of their uniforms, they began to hysterically break out into laughter. For the rest of the game, I was soaking wet (not because of the actual rain), but because I simply could not make it through the game without one of my infamous wipeouts. I would love to say that this instance provided some simple instantaneous laughter; however, it is still providing laughter today… Some things people just don’t forget. Every time I wear that white bow, I see the mud that has still not come out. I am just thankful it is not on You Tube yet! Oh the life of a rookie… 

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